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Mon, Jul. 21st, 2014, 10:02 pm
grcesar: Coming out

Well, yeah, I don't even know if I'm doing this right...

My name is Cesar, I'm 19 years old (almost 20, whatever), I'm from Mexico city aaaand this is my story (???)


So... a day ago I told my parents that I'm gay, it was like a pressure decision (my dad asked me) after thinking it a lot I thought the right thing to do was telling them (why not, right?).

When I finally made it downstairs, I told them that I'm gay and it was OK, my mom didn't get surprised at all but my dad was in shock, he went like "sorry, what?!", I started explaining what I felt and why I was telling them in that moment and they told me it was fine, that they support me and that they love me even more with this. (Not big of a deal, right?)

THE THING IS, after that the environment at home got awkward. I'm shy and I suffer from social anxiety, you may think that the anxiety doesn't involve my family, the truth is it does. When my parents are home I star overthinking the situation and I get very nervous around them, I don't know how to control this and it sucks, I know I have the support from my parents and that a lot of the LGBT community have more problems than me, having to deal with not supporting parents or friends or whatever. I'm not trying to victimize myself but I'm really struggling with this, I don't know how to be "normal" again with them around me (not that being gay is anormal) but in the way that I don't feel that they are thinking about me being gay and being a different person if that makes sense.

I just wanted to take this out of my mind, I don't even know if someone is going to read this or care about this, it's my way to get rid of all this stress.
Sorry if my english is not perfect, but english is a universal language and I really want to share my mind.

Fri, Oct. 10th, 2014 01:15 am (UTC)

Hola Cesar. I just found your post and wanted to say that I hope things have improved since May with your family/friends. Do things feel more "normal" now?

Your situation is exactly why I haven't come out at home... fearing how it will change things.